Snooze Button Dreams
Snooze Button Dreams
Snooze Button Dreams
February 20, 2007
On Libraries Sucking
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I've never liked libraries. Not the actual idea (a place with books), but what they are. I have lots of books at home, hell; we're this close to having to stack them on the floor because we're running out of bookcases. And that includes the one we built out of scrapwood and spare screws.

But libraries suck. Firstly, they're way too quiet. Without any soft background noise, all I hear is the other people in the room. They're sniffling, coughing, shuffling in their coats, having low conversations with the other homeless people, etc.

Secondly, there's just too goddamn much there. Go to Amazon.com, search the book you want to read, and buy it for three and a half fucking dollars. Why spend your time to go poring through some freakin library looking for a book? If you're going to spend the time to read the damn thing, just pay three bucks and take some real time to indulge yourself in it. If it sucks, Amazon.com. If it's good, stack it on the floor with the rest of your collection.

Thirdly, very few libraries contain any information that can't be found online; in the comfort of your own home. Yeah, maybe The Library of Congress has the Constitution, the Declaration, the Bill of Rights; but seriously, how many times have they been reproduced - word for word? Libraries are useless unless you're looking for a really voyeuristic place to slam ham. Yeah, I just said 'slam ham'.

I know. Some people will claim that libraries contain lots of locally specific information. I call BS, becuase they won't carry it unless they buy the rights to some smalltime exhibit of the month. "'Early Black Folk', showing Feb 1 - Feb 28th"; "'The History of the (your local county here) Shellfishing Industry', showing the first week of all months ending in R". Locally specific public records (births, deaths, census, etc) can be found in all kinds of other places. Obviously online, but also at courthouses and county seats. Hell, when we applied for our marriage license, I was so busy poring over the segregated birth logs that I damn near missed the whole "Put your hand on The Book" thing.

The only reason libraries still exist, is because we've got all this goddamned microfiche and we can't figure out how to turn it into ones and zeroes.

Posted by shank | Permalink | TrackBack (0)
Comments

Buy me a Gutenberg Bible on Amazon and I'll convert to your way of thinking. Otherwise, not so much.

Posted by: Jennifer at February 20, 2007 10:28 PM

Check your local antique bookstore. We found a leatherbound dictionary with 'unique typeface' for 25 dollars. Yeah, it's ungodly heavy and retardedly obnoxious, but talk about a conversation peice!

Besides, if the only reason you have to go to the library is to read Gutenberg Bibles, you're bascially attempting to shit in an infinitely (and ridiculously) far place from where you eat. You can do the same thing at home and flush it, without having to go ten feet from the kitchen.

Posted by: shank at February 20, 2007 11:02 PM

BTW, the Gutenbergs go for their own weight in poo on Amazon.

Oh wait, you wanted an original? Why? So you could smell his sweat on the paper? Because it's that much mo' betta to read? Because it brings us all closer to the blah, blah, blah, blah,blah? Give me a break. Reading an original is absolutely no different than reading a copy. There's no sensory depth, because the words don't reside in their medium.

It's not like wanting an original recording or an original painting. There's depth there, in the medium the song/art is layed on. But words are different. Their power is not amplified by reading them on the original pages.

Posted by: shank at February 20, 2007 11:13 PM

There is more to books than the words in them. The Gutenberg Bible is not important for the story of Genesis it contains...books are artifacts.

And some of us can't afford to buy every book we need to use for research. And some of us actually research books that aren't available in printings of millions.

Posted by: Jennifer at February 21, 2007 01:58 AM

I don't know about this one. I've done a lot of research in my day. Reference boks cost a fortune and they're often hard to come by. Sometimes you just need a name.

And of course, the the microfilm, old newspapers, etc.

Posted by: Paul at February 21, 2007 07:11 AM

Libraries are a good place to decide whether a particular reference book is worth the expense to buy.

Posted by: Ted at February 21, 2007 02:05 PM

Okay, I changed my mind. The Law Library on campus sucks beyond all reason. It's on the wrong side of campus (i.e., not near the buildings I haunt), there's very little damn parking, and they won't cooperate in the inter-library loan program all the other campus libraries share in (so I can't order a book and pick it up at the Main Library...I have to go to the wrong side of campus, not be able to park, and get it there).

Posted by: Jennifer at February 21, 2007 03:19 PM

Oh man, shank. You knew I had to come in for this one, right?
As a librarian, I couldn't disagree more.
There are people who read 5 to 7 books a week (or more). Why would they buy that many books and then have to either sell them or give them away in order not to turn their home into a fire hazard?
Some lower income families can't afford to order things from Amazon or shop the local bookstore, the library is a free place to check out books of any subject.
Most public libraries are carrying movies now. That's probably our most checked out item; the DVD.
Lower income families love taking advantage of the free DVD check outs.

Then let's talk about MY section of the library: the computers.
Here, I mostly deal with the lower income people also. These people can't afford computers of their own. Some have computers but can't afford internet access. Some live in rural areas that don't have high speed internet.
Some people work from home and their computers crash or their printer is on the fritz so they head to the library to do their work.
Some people travel and need to check their email or find direction so they borrow our computers or they bring their laptop in and connect to our free wireless internet.
Students use our computers for their projects.
Teachers require book resources as well as internet resources so the books are still relevent.

Public libraries also offer programs for children and adults, free of charge.
There are book clubs, writing clubs, lectures and other educational programs...FREE.

Yes, it's quiet and yes, you can find TONS of the same reference information on the internet but there are good reasons why people like me have jobs.

So...suck on it! ;)

Posted by: De at February 21, 2007 03:38 PM

Goddammit, I hate the blogosphere, with it's condescending self-correction. Fuck all!

Posted by: shank at February 22, 2007 09:13 AM

My library, actually my county federated library system, doesn't suck We have an excellent search engine which gives access to every book, magazine, cd, dvd and stuffed animal in the system, including the three sub-basements under the city block sized central library. I have checked out and taken out books last checked out in 1950; I've checked out a book printed in 1875. I can check out any of these items on impulse, and sometimes do so because it popped up in a Countycat search for something else entirely.

Posted by: triticale at February 22, 2007 11:02 PM
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