I, of course, got this...

You scored as Maximus. After his family was murdered by the evil emperor Commodus, the great Roman general Maximus went into hiding to avoid Commodus's assassins. He became a gladiator, hoping to dominate the colosseum in order to one day get the chance of killing Commodus. Maximus is valiant, courageous, and dedicated. He wants nothing more than the chance to avenge his family, but his temper often gets the better of him. Indiana Jones 75% Maximus 75% James Bond, Agent 007 71% Captain Jack Sparrow 67% Lara Croft 54% William Wallace 46% El Zorro 38% The Terminator 33% Batman, the Dark Knight 33% The Amazing Spider-Man 29% Neo, the "One" 25% Which Action Hero Would You Be? v. 2.0 created with QuizFarm.com

Only a fricken 75% score too, but I like those two guys. I guess if I'm 75% Maximus and 75% Indiana Jones, that's like 150% head-stomping, smart-talking badass; right? Plus I got Jack Sparrow in there, talk about a one-in-a-million wingman. But Lara Croft? Dude, if I was more than half Lara Croft, I wouldn't leave the house. I mean, whether it was the upper half or the lower half, it wouldn't matter. I'd be at home playin' with my womanly parts.

And Paul got 100-fucking-percent Bond? I think he rigged that shit, the wily old coot.