So I got up this morning and what to my wondering eyes should appear? No, not the fat elf. I'm talking snow! Actual frozen water from the sky lay across the landscape like a soft white baby's blanket. A really big-ass soft white baby's blanket. A really big-ass soft white baby's blanket with holes ripped in it from trees and cars and stuff. And the spots where the snow had melted on the street looked like cigarette burns. Now isn't that nice - cigarette burns in a baby's blanket. God can be such a jerk sometimes.