I've had a banner Monday; and it all started in the most bizarre fashion.

I take plastic Tupperware-ish containers of leftovers to work each day for lunch. Well, today I took my soup out of the microwave and for some strange reason, the container imploded; bathing my crotch in hot soup. Seriously, I opened the door, slid my container out; and I shit you not, the entire thing sucked in on itself until it just gave way, all over my new pants. For the life of me I still don't understand it.

The Wife was kind enough to bring me a change of clothes; but I'm pretty sure the people in my office think something strange happened. None of them saw the soup incident, and I'm sure they noticed I changed pants; but no one asked any questions.

Then I took my car to the shop to get inspected. It passed inspection($40), but the mechanic found a motor mount that needs replacing ($250), the rear rotors needed to be turned ($135), the front brakes need to be replaced ($220), the brake fluid needs to be flushed ($45), the power steering fluid needs to be flushed ($89), the clutch slave cylinder needs to be replaced, and that "shouldn't be done" without replacing the master cylinder too ($450). I asked them if, considering my frequent sizeable contributions to their bottom line this past year; they might consider profit sharing or maybe a percent stake in the business. I don't know why, but they started laughing.

It was at this point that I decided I'd better go the hell home, before something really bad happened. I took care of a bunch of chores around the house; and everything seemed to be going well. However, Monday was not through punishing me yet. I pulled a load of laundry out of the dryer, and an empty chapstick container came with it. Apparently, the chapstick container leaked oily residue all over the back of one of my work shirts; leaving it looking like a debutante from some Ron Jeremy production.

Then I burned myself on the stupid iron. I cannot wait to see what tomorrow brings.