Gut Busting
A guy ate 47 grilled cheese sandwiches in ten minutes this weekend. No mention of if he’ll need to use blasting caps to take a dump in the coming days. I just don’t get it.

Sports
In soccer news, Persia got their asses kicked. I think they threw it. That skid mark of a president kept threatening to attend the games like Hitler at the 1936 Olympics. The big difference is that this guy likes to stir the pot at every opportunity and Hitler was less arm waving and more action. Give it time, I guess. This guy’s obviously a big fan of Der Führer and he needs to get whacked.

Terror
Al Qaeda in Iraq announced Zarqawi’s successor as if were a posting in the WSJ. I don’t know about you, but if I headed a terrorist organization I wouldn’t be announcing or posting promotions and roster changes. It just seems…like the stupidest thing I could ever imagine. If the guy exists at all and if he’s not a red herring.

Obits
The guy who wrote (I think) the theme to 2001: A Space Odyssey is dead. He did for kettle drums what Einstein did for physics.

Opinion
I’m having new flooring installed at the house and it’s been a goat-hump from the get-go. The thing I really don’t understand is why these people can’t just show up at the time they say they will? Is it really so hard?

When they do show up one of them stays on his cell phone the whole time, often disappearing for hours and the other guy doesn’t speak English. Or Spanish, German or French. I have no idea what it was but I couldn’t fucking parlay no matter how hard I tried. Am I expected to know Albanian or Serbo-Croatian or whatever it was? Meanwhile the work’s not getting done and I’m getting antsy and this bastard goes around my house fucking whistling all day. Literally. And I don’t want them using my toilet anymore.

Not much of a post, I know. Spare me the critique.