My girlfriend and I have the unwritten rule of three-
This is, simply put- A free pass to sleep with three pre-agreed upon famous people should we ever get the chance. It’s a nice little semi-harmless exercise- We get to hoot, whistle and drool unabashedly in front of each other when any of the five chosen ones appear on TV.
Yes, I did say five. (More on that in a minute..)
My girlfriend’s list started out okay naming Jude Law as contestant number one. Fine.
Matt Damon came in at number two, boyish good looks and all that crap that she started naming for her reasons yadda, yadda, hotandcute, yadda yadda.
Last?
Angelina Jolie.
I nearly choked on my coffee. Insta-chub.
I thought I’d just hit the latent-porno-bi-girlfriend jackpot. Alas, my Girlfriend was way ahead of me, raking the needle off the mental porno soundtrack I had playing in my mind.
“Only her”, she said, claiming no other woman “does it for her”.
My insta-chub became an insta-turtle.
It appears that every woman has at least one woman they’d go “comfortable shoes” with. I had to do a little “research” at work, and lo and behold- Angelina Jolie apparently has just such an appeal, this smoldering craziness/hotness which even straight women find attractive.
Oh.
My list? Pfft.
It’s a no-brainer. Waaaay up top, perched upon some sort of swing or pedestal, surrounded by white light and angelic voices (or fluffy clouds depending on how long it’s been..) is the incomparable deliciousness of Halle Berry.
Second place goes to Jennifer Aniston. She manages to look both hot and wholesome, making me want to put her in a topless cheerleader outfit and mickey mouse ears. I’m not sure why…
Third place? Should I ever hit the Hottie Lottery and land a night with Ms Jolie, (*cough* nowayinhell *cough*) I think she would kill me afterwards like some mantis.
I might let her.
I might have to if I get her before my girlfriend does.
The question is- Do you and your wife/husband/S.O. have such a list, and if so- Who’s on it?
Nope. I guess we are just too vanilla for that. Or not into hollywood, take your pick. The game actually makes me feel a bit uncomfortable, I guess I'm a bit of a prude really. I mean I know it is a game and that most people playing it wouldn't really give in to the moment if given the chance, but still...
I guess you have to keep in mind that neither my girlfriend or I will ever get to be in close proximity to these people.
Even if- by some weird twist- we were ever to get close enough, we are not likely to find ourselves being singled out for a night of freaky monkey circus sex.
This is what makes the game relatively harmless.
I have three: Matthew McConahay, Eric Roberts & Jerry O'connell. I would kill for these men.
His: Typical. Britney & Pamela Anderson (yawn)
Oh and I go bi - easy - for Catherine Zeta Jones. She so does it for me. Beautiful, exotic and sexy.
I know that my husband goes for Sandra Bullock, but not in a crazy weird way - he says that she reminds him of me (how sweet), and I... don't really have anyone, now that I think of it. That's interesting really. I mean, there are a lot of good-looking men in Hollywood (as there are elsewhere), but when it all boils down to it none of them would touch me with a 10-foot pole, so why put the effort into it? Besides, my husband looks like Tom Cruise and is incredibly sexy so why go looking elsewhere?