Dopple-G here, everyone. I'm the source of much of Jim's inanity, but today I bring you a political rant all my own.

For the many who claimed that they were leaving the country if the challenger didn’t win the presidential election, I’d like to extend this opportunity to encourage them to follow through with that promise.

Allow me to switch to second person for a while so I may address those individuals that promised to leave. Claiming that you intend to leave the country if an election doesn’t swing the way you want shows several things about your personality.

First and foremost, you’re selfish. The fate of our great nation is secondary to your personal agenda and you’re willing to leave if things don’t go your way. Sticking around and trying to make this a better place is apparently a foreign concept to your way of thinking. You have no sense of pride in what is America and are willing to seek foreign soil to find a better life.

The second thing we can determine about your person is that you’re weak. When the going gets tough, you claim that you intend to get going! Wouldn’t you be better served with an attitude that says, “My position isn’t as universal as I thought. As for me and my party, we need to be more persuasive with the American people. That’s what we need to work on for the next election.” Instead, the left is confounded about the election results and resorts to derogatory comments and condescending attitudes. It doesn’t occur that you might just be in the vocal minority.

Lastly, you’re intolerant and uncooperative. The people spoke and were heard. Since their voice doesn’t resonate with your own, you decide to exit the stage. Compromise doesn’t play a role in your thinking. The morals that the American people want are the ones they elected into the White House. America wants a man who is resolute, unwavering, and unflappable in command.

May I recommend Canada? Our neighbor to the north epitomizes much of the Democratic agenda. They have socialized medicine and the taxes are high enough to be painful. Of course, if you want high quality medical care, you’ll have to pay for that yourself. You’ll get all the benefits of lots of state sponsored programs and the state will subsidize such important items like hockey teams and the lumber industry. Canada practices socialism-lite and that is essentially what the Democrats think America should do. Canada doesn’t take a stand in the world. They aren’t a power to be reckoned with. When was the last time that Canada’s objections in the United Nations were in the news? In Canada you’ll have a weaker currency, a weaker economy, and a weaker nation.

What does it say about you if you stay in America now? Don’t claim that you’re working for a better America. It has already been established that you’re selfish and the national agenda is second to your own. You’re too weak to stay and too weak to go. Face it, you’re not made of the same stuff that the founding fathers were.

All that being said, I’d like to offer those that want to stay the opportunity to do so. America isn’t a divided nation like the media portrays. Differing points of view make the good old US of A stronger. So, retract your petty statement and stay. You’ll be welcomed back with open arms on one condition: apologize to a conservative.