Update: Results at the end of the extended entry.

Ah, yes. It is time once again for the Cheddar X

1. What would you want written on your epitaph?
This reminds me of that old joke about what you'd like people to say at your wake: Hey, look! He's breathing! I've never thought about my epitaph before. Hopefully nobody else will be either for a while. I guess I'd just like a mention of my familial positions. Something like Beloved son, Loving husband, Respected father, Spoiling grandfather, Fantastic great-grandfather, Superawesome great-great-grandfather... You get the picture.

2. What do you collect and why?
MyPoints. Because it's a no-effort thing that nets me a few Toys-R-Us gift cards each year.

I used to collect money but now I have kids so that doesn't happen any more. Bad-um-bum. Yeah. Seriously though, I actually do have a money collection - coins and bills from around the world. Whenever my dad was overseas or down in Central or South America for the Air Force or FBI (or on vacation) he would collect some of the local currency for me. The collection has been pretty static for the past 15 years or so since he stopped making those trips and the parents have mostly been vacationing in the USA.

3. What's the dumbest legal action you know of?
Off the top of my head I can't top the fat bastard who sued McDonalds for his obesity. It took big, sweaty, fat-caked balls plus some sort of negative intelligence I don't quite comprehend in order to pursue that. We need tort reform to allow companies and people who are targets of this ridiculous shit to be awarded their court and related expenses when jackasses like this sue.

4. What single decision in your life do you wish you could change? (might be a double, oh well)
We had this question before, or something similar. I wouldn't change a thing. You see, I like me and I like my life. I'm a believer in causality - the old "for the want of a nail the kingdom was lost" or "Butterfly effect" thing. How do I know that I'll be where I am if something in my past was different? How do I know I'd even be close to the same person? No, no changes for me please.

Actually, now that I think about it there's an excellent exploit here that I can take advantage of. My change is that I would decide to buy a lottery ticket with the correct numbers to win last week's big lottery. Recent history, no big changes from my current perspective (except having shit loads of money). Yeah, that'll work.

5. Some people resemble their dogs, do you know anyone that resembles their name?
Maybe some porn stars, I guess. You know - Busty Mellons or Dick Swingin. Heh, just kidding. No, I don't know anybody who resembles their name. Unless you've got a freak-o name like Summer Breezy or Talldark Nhansome I'm not sure how you could.

6. What's your favourite / most used unit of time?
Do people have a favorite unit of time? That's wacked. I guess that I use "day" more often than any other time unit. That's if you're talking about conversation. If you're talking about what unit I actually use the most often, that would be planck time. One unit of planck time being approximately 1.351 x 10-43 seconds, I use a whole lot of them.

7. What's the best internet time device you've seen so far?
I saw a java clock that followed your mouse around on a webpage with the components streaming along behind as it moved and then reforming the clock when you held the mouse still. That was neat.

POINTS: I've told a fib. One of those entries up there isn't true. Can you figure out which one? Each person may guess once and there will be one point awarded for each person who participates. Points go to the people who guessed correctly. So if 10 people guess and 2 got it right, those 2 people would each get 5 points. Cool, eh?

Some time this weekend we'll wrap up the contest and give away the points.

Please note: If I'm commenting on the one that's a lie I'm still going to be lying to support the lie so you won't know that it was the entry that was a lie. Confused yet? I sure am!

Don't forget that you can stick your email address in that box in the sidebar under the Snooze Point Leaders and you'll get notified whenever points are available.

Results:

#1 - This one's true, as far as my joking about it goes. The only thoughts I've really had about my epitaph are that it won't be written for a long, long time. Sorry, tommy.

#3 - True as well. It's likely that I could look up some cases that were even more inane than Fat Bastard v. McDonalds but I can't think of anything more ridiculous off the top of my head. Logic has no home here, Clancy.

#4 - I really don't want to change anything in my past. I'm one of those freaky-wierd people who is happy with their life. I wouldn't want to do anything that could jeopardize that and who knows what a change in my past, even one that seems inconsequential, might do? No luck this time, Jeremy.

#5 - I know a couple of names that carry an aura because of the fame or infamy of somebody who had that name in history but I've never met a person who looked like their name. Better luck next time Tiffani.

#6 - Honestly I have no favored unit of time. Fortnights are pretty cool, though. Mike the Marine

#7 - Rob caught this lie like a Yankee outfielder. I have little to no appreciation for swirly java anything. I will vacate at lightspeed any website that puts streamers or trailers or anything else idiotic on or following behind my cursor. The best internet time program I ever saw was an extremely simple little doodad that synched my system time to an atomic clock when the computer booted up. Simple, out of the way, virtually invisible, actual functionality. That's my idea of a good program.

Six contestants and one correct answer means Rob gets 6 points, which puts him within grabbing distance of Mike the Marine. Ooooh! You can almost taste the tension!