idiosyncrasy
Pronunciation: "i-dE-&-'si[ng]-kr&-sE
Function: noun
Etymology: "idio" from the French idiote meaning Belgian, "syncrasy" from the Russian synchronous meaning swimming in a group wearing stupid smiles and nose plugs

1 An oddity of manner or temperament : eccentricity : something that other people go "Ewww!" when they hear about it
2 An oddment that generally falls under the category of "too much information"

You know those lists of 100 things about me that are very popular with blogsters? Basically they're just a list of idiosyncrasies. But they are loooooong lists. Who came up with 100 for the goal anyway? Probably a fascist. Those lists must be a bitch to write and who really wants to read 100 things about somebody?

So you get three from me. Three is a number I can get a handle on. I mean, I can count that high with less than a handful of fingers. Plus it's mystical. The number three appears all over the place: the holy trinity, the Three Stooges, Kukla, Fran and Ollie, you get the picture.

1: I take my pants off when I poop. Comfort is king with me and I just don't feel comfortable with my ankles tied together while trying to squeeze out a stink pickle. Spread the legs wide on the seat and you'll be surprised how much better you flow. Trust me.

2: I sleep at the edge of the bed. Well, not right on the edge of the bed but at least touching it. If I don't have a hand or foot on an edge I can't sleep because I lose my orientation and position sense. Basically I have to be near the edge of the bed because if I'm in the middle of it I'm afraid I'll fall off.

3: If I ever get held up in classic style where the robber comes up behind and puts a gun to my head I will be dead. This is because I will totally freak the robber out when I am seized with paroxysms of laughter. The back of my head is so ticklish I will get tremors along my whole body when it is touched. Lovely Wife gets a kick out of this one.

4: I get a fierce enjoyment out of breaking rules, even my own.