Snooze Button Dreams
Snooze Button Dreams
Snooze Button Dreams
December 05, 2005
My name is Paul, and I’m an addict
(Category: Cheeses of Nazareth )

It’s been more than a week now and I have not smoked. One thing nobody told me is that when you stop smoking, you lose the ability to poop. Well, I’m here to tell you, if you stop smoking you will stop pooping.

My other addiction is still raging out of control. iTunes. I can’t stop downloading songs. It always starts off innocently enough. I just listen to the 30 second sample. But, shit, to me, that’s like snorting heroin. It’s not enough to keep the buzz going. I need the full-on injection.

I find myself reliving my youth through iTunes. I seek out various obscure songs from my youth that invoke memories. Album sides that I used to make out to. Songs I was embarrassed to listen to even way back then.

I’ve been downloading songs from iTunes for a long time. Hell, I didn’t even have an iPod when I started downloading. I remember the day someone first told me about it.

“You can kill hours there, man, just listening to 30 second clips of songs you haven’t heard in years.”

And it was true. By day three I was downloading songs and burning CDs the old fashioned way. It wasn’t long before I just gave up and bought the iPod. And now there’s no stopping it. I “need” the songs. I’m a musician and a music snob so I really go the extra mile to seek out remastered stuff—from classical and Jazz to The Pixies.

There ought to be some kind of twelve step program for this shit.

I guess we're all addicted to something.

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Comments

That's okay, I'm reliving my youth, too. Call it the compilation of the soundtrack of my life.

I find downloading music a healthier (and less expensive) addiction than cigarettes. At least I've stayed away from those.

And yes, you will poop again. Your colon will adapt to life without nicotine.

Posted by: diamond dave at December 5, 2005 05:36 PM

I hate labels. Why does something someone enjoys so much as to spend hours of time doing it get labeled addiction? Maybe I JUST REALLY LIKE DOING IT. I am addicted to several things. Here are a few few">examples.

But I digress. I am addicted to everything I enjoy.

Posted by: Dortch at December 6, 2005 11:21 AM

I also hate poor html posting and bad links.

Posted by: Dortch at December 6, 2005 11:22 AM

As one addict to another:

Pandora

Please don't hit me. *flee*

Posted by: Margi at December 6, 2005 11:47 AM

Margi, how could you do this to me?

That's cool!

Posted by: Paul at December 6, 2005 12:57 PM

As for the poop situation, your wife should wait until you're on the throne, then announce that she put a dent in the car.

Posted by: Ted at December 8, 2005 12:13 PM

if you stop smoking you will stop pooping

Oh, no, honey. That's just you.

What happened when I quit?--I stopped thinking.

I mean I became stuck on stupid in the worst possible way.

"Do I make a right or a left turn here?"

"Uh, I dunno, JACKASS, I JUST QUIT SMOKING."

Oh, did I mention the temper? Because, the temper.

Seriously, regularity was the least of my problems.

Posted by: ilyka at December 12, 2005 07:18 AM
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