Burger (age 3 as you know) has a vocabulary problem. Specifically, he's been using words that should be reserved for grown-ups. More specifically, words that should be reserved for grown-up political pundits and/or grown-ups who just hit their thumb with a hammer. We are working on correcting this antisocial behaviour but sometimes it just blows right up in our faces.

[Burger and Bacon are bouncing on the trampoline. Bacon makes contact with his brother (most likely by intention but that couldn't be proven in a court of law) and Burger responds.]

Burger: You're an asshole!

Lovely Wife: What did you say? You get over here right away young man!

[Burger makes his way slowly over to Lovely Wife, defiance writ large upon his brow.]

Lovely Wife: You do NOT use words like that! If you have a problem with your brother you work it out with him. If you can't do that, bring it to me. There is no excuse for swearing.

[Burger mumbles something under his breath. It's clear we have not achieved "buy in".]

Lovely Wife: I'm serious, Burger. Do not use cuss words. Do you even know what an "asshole" is?

[Burger brightens noticeably.]

Burger: Yeah! I do! Bacon's an asshole!

I fear he has discovered our primary weakness. We are functionally unable to discipline him when we are laughing our asses off.