Snooze Button Dreams
Snooze Button Dreams
Snooze Button Dreams
May 03, 2005
Tastes like chicken
(Category: News & Notes )

[profanity alert]

I heard about this on NPR the other day and it pissed me off to no end.

The ivory-billed woodpecker, a magnificent bird long given up for extinct, has been sighted in the cypress and tupelo swamp of the Cache River National Wildlife Refuge in Arkansas, scientists announced yesterday.

That's not the part that pissed me off. I actually thought that was pretty cool.

Dr. John Fitzpatrick, director of the Cornell Lab of Ornithology, who led the effort to confirm the sightings, said at a news conference in Washington, "This is really the most spectacular creature we could imagine rediscovering."

That didn't piss me off either. I'm happy for the birders. This is like finding the holy grail for them and it really is an impressive looking bird.

The Nature Conservancy and other conservation groups have bought land in the region of the refuge to help preserve a larger area.

Nope, that didn't piss me off either. Private groups spending their money to preserve nature is okay in my book. People can do what they want with their money.

[Fitzpatrick] was joined by Interior Secretary Gale Norton, who announced that the agency, along with the Department of Agriculture, had proposed to spend $10 million of federal money for research, habitat protection and law enforcement efforts to protect the bird.

That's the one! What the fuck!? The government wants to spend $10fuckingmilliondollars to protect one damned bird? That's right - ONE bird was found. It took them an entire year to verify that ONE ivory-billed woodpecker was alive and they want to spend TEN MILLION DOLLARS on it!

What in the ever living fuck are these worthless shits thinking of? If people care enough about this bird then they'll pony up the cash to protect it. And guess what? They do care and they did pony up. The bird's habitat is already purchased and protected! By private organizations! The way it should be!

Damn, am I pissed!

(This rant spurred because I was reminded of this travesty by a post at I Hate My Cubicle)

Posted by Jim | Permalink
Comments

I'm in the camp that hates woodpeckers, ivory-billed or not. I heard the story on NPR too, and I'm not convinced they've even got what they claim. Aside from the fact that it is NOT "the most spectacular creature they could imagine discovering."

If they found a dodo bird, now that would be something. But even that would pale in comparison to finding, say, a T-Rex. Now THAT'S a find. And not something that could be taken out with a Daisy BB gun.

I've currently got a red-headed woodpecker that's making my life miserable by pecking the shit out of my aluminum gutters every morning. He is in serious danger of meeting his ivory-billed brethren in the afterlife a lot sooner than he thinks.

Posted by: Paul at May 3, 2005 10:02 AM

hehe...I know I'm not supposed to laugh because you're enraged but...uh...hehehehehe...

P.S. Oh yeah...POTTY MOUTH!!!!! :-P

Posted by: Pam at May 3, 2005 10:28 AM

Wonder if we could save the taxpayers ten million dollars by shooting the damn thing?

Posted by: diamond dave at May 3, 2005 02:13 PM

Erm am I the only one that wonders if spending 10 million on one bird is a little pointless?*

Unless they find at least one more then "little pecker" ain't gonna be around for much longer.

*I mean aside from Jim's minor adversion to this use of public funds

Posted by: Rob at May 4, 2005 05:02 AM
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