Got on the elevator this morning and was immediately assaulted. Somebody had fouled the beast.

Got off of the elevator and was met with a stronger version of the same odor. Apparently somebody had done a preliminary attack in the elevator and then launched the atomic blast in the atrium.

Walked to my cube and found no lessening of the odoriferous monstrosity. The terrorist must be somebody in my department.

Went to the break room for coffee. Stank present. Now I began to worry.

In amazement I made a full tour of the floor. The smell of anal exhalation was everywhere.

Either we've been stink bombed or somebody's guts have turned feral.