Correct me if I'm wrong (cause I'm too damn lazy to look it up), but isn't he talking about the cremasteric reflex there?

Nope. The cremasteric reflex is the one where the scrotum tightens upon stimulus to the inner thigh.

That's one of my favorites, by the way. In case anybody is taking notes.

See, I knew there was a reason I never applied to medical school.

Now I'm tempted to write a fake letter to Penthouse that works in the phrase "cremasteric reflex" and, so help me, I'm not even really sure why.

I think it's because I'm pretty sure you can't write successful erotic fiction that uses medical terms. It's like this bit from Chris Rock's book:

". . . talking dirty is cool, [but] words like 'penis' and 'vagina' should never come up. I once knew a woman who used to say 'vagina' and think she was talking dirty because she said it LOUD. I used to call her Loud Dirty Girl.

"HER: I feel your PENIS! In my VAGINA!
"ME: Stop it. Stop it! I can't even touch you anymore."

I can lose a stiffy over "vagina" too. Depending on how it's uttered it can bring up a visual of Oprah and that's just a total mood killer.

I would ask how you wound up subconsciously connecting "Oprah" and "vagina," but then you might tell me.

It's actually totally innocent. It was a skit on SNL or Mad TV (don't remember which) that had Oprah with some other wimmen talking about their VAGINAS. The one statement that still haunts me is the Oprah character characterizing her vagina as a natural disaster. "My VAGINA is a mudslide."

I still shudder.

If I'm flying high on a good bout of horny, it's not a mood kill when the word vagina is uttered.

However, I've always found the word "cervix" to be a pretty powerful turn-off. Not sure why.

Why are there no songs about the cremasteric reflex? That's a rich lyrical area, I'm telling you.

Keep it up, Ryan, and Jim'll write one for you. He's tricky like that.

And vaginas and mudslides in the same sentence--well, I have to punt to Newspeak for that one. Doubleplusungood.

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