I don't have excellent dream recollection but I woke up last night with this one bright and steady in the ol' noggin. I jotted down the principle stuff and have been able to remember a good part of it.

The basic theme of the dream was fixing up a house. Not my house and not me fixing it up, I was just an observer. The guy fixing up the house was big and very mean. The house was already looking good because it was brand new but the components were all cheap and kept breaking so they had to be replaced or repaired. The overall condition of the house was getting worse and worse because this brand new stuff kept breaking faster than it could be fixed. The dream had a very strong feeling of inevitability and being overwhelmed.

So then there's a helper. A sexy brunette dressed up like a porn star trying to look like a French maid. Really long high heels. She's trying her best to clean but she's just as inevitably overwhelmed as the guy. He's angry that she can't clean fast enough so he smashes her with an axe and tosses out her body. Then he opens up his aluminum brief case and takes out a new, uninflated girl. She self inflates and is exactly the same as the first helper. She's more motivated but still can't keep up with the increasing mess.

She starts to get frantic 'cause she knows that if she can't clean everything up she's going to get the axe so she rushes and gets careless. She vacuums up the M&M Guys!! For some reason this was about the worst thing she could have done. The dream follows them through the tube system of the central vac system. They're making their dry, deadpan comments to each other through the entire trip. They make it to the collection bag at the end (it's a fine mesh bag instead of a vacuum canister).

Now they're in trouble. The M&M Guys are suffocating in the mesh bag. I'm now in the dream. It's just so urgent to save the M&M Guys that I have to be there. I start yelling and screaming for the guy. I can't actually touch anything so I'm powerless to do more to solve the plight of our candy heroes. He arrives and starts trying to rip open the bag. I'm telling him that it was an accident but he has to hurry. He gets more and more angry as he can't save the M&M Guys.

Here's where it gets wierd. I'm everybody now, in turn. One second I'm the red M&M, yelling that I'm suffocating and somebody better save me. The next I'm the chick, apologizing to the M&M guys for killing them. Then I'm the guy, absolutely furious and ready to kill, still unable to actually do anything constructive including saving the M&M Guys. Then I'm back as me, no longer a party to the dream but in my observer roll.

I'm the chick. The guy abandons his attempt to save the M&M Guys and turns toward me. He picks up his axe. I'm the yellow M&M. I can breath after all. I see the guy about to chop up the gal. I know that he's making a mistake since I'm okay after all but I don't yell for him to stop or anything. I'm the guy, swinging the axe. Time jump a couple seconds (I don't actually see the axe hit). I'm me as observer watching the guy take another deflated chick out of his aluminum briefcase. I know that he is very foolish. How long does he think he can get away with killing these girls? They're not just going to take it forever. I don't warn him though - I don't like him and I want the girl to win.

The girl self inflates (and is exactly the same as her departed sisters) and is terrified. She knows everything that happened to the other two. She picks up the axe and starts swinging at the guy. She's crying and not too effective. He's a big guy and he almost catches the axe. She does get him though and stands there crying and panting, covered in gross bits. She's probably hurt too cause I think he managed to land a few punches. The M&M Guys make one of their sarcastic deadpan comments.

I wake up.

How's that for vivid and freaky? Maybe I should send this one to The Dream Doctor.